Self Motivation For Your Life

7 Tips For Unstoppable Motivation And Enduring Success

2008-12-18T22:55:00.000-08:00

by: Peter Murphy
1. Success is not achieved accidentally. It is a systematic, deliberate process of deciding what you want to do with your life, what you will do when you get there, and what the steps are to get you where you want to be.
One of the most important aspects of success is the ability to visualize your path and stay focused on your goal until you reach it.
2. The sooner you envision your dreams and develop a plan to turn them into reality, the faster you will accomplish your goals. Mental pictures are a mechanism to lead you down the path of true independence and motivation.
Procrastination is a self-defeating behavior that develops in part due to low self-esteem and fear of failure. Your imagination is like a preview of your future.
If you don't use your imagination your life will remain mundane and unfulfilling.
3. Overcoming procrastination is the first step in helping you create the lifestyle you desire. You must change the habits and behaviors that led you to procrastinate in the first place.
Change is a slow process so be sure to reward yourself along the way for small achievements.
Instead of focusing on the difficulty of a large task, break it into smaller jobs and create a timeline for finishing them.
4. Several small jobs done over time are much more manageable that one large task with no end in sight.
You'll be astonished at how much you can get done if you concentrate on one thing at a time instead of cluttering your mind with multiple tasks.
Try tackling the more undesirable tasks early in the day so that by afternoon you can pursue more pleasant activities.
5. Relieve yourself of the pressure created by clutter in your office or home. Develop a filing system, rid yourself of unnecessary papers, and give yourself an organized place to work.
When you exercise self-discipline in your surroundings as well as your behaviors, you will make major strides in accomplishing your goals in a shorter period of time.
No matter what is happening around you, keep your mind focused on the reward you'll receive by reaching your goals.
6. If people or outside forces distract you, use the power of the human mind to block out what impedes your progress and concentrate solely on the task at hand.
You will make remarkable progress by refusing to let others alter the path you have chosen.
Overcoming procrastination and staying motivated is the way to lifetime success and happiness. You'll achieve your goals rapidly when you stay focused on your destination and the rewards that will follow.
7. Review your habits and way of thinking to determine what you are visualizing most of the time. If your visions do not lead you in the direction of accomplishing your goals, then you must change them.
Discipline yourself to concentrate on your goals the majority of the time, and if you stray from the path, get promptly back on.
Imagine what the rewards will be when you finally reach your destination and keep that thought foremost in your mind.
Procrastination is of no use to you in your quest to fulfill your dreams. Lose those old habits and replace them with habits that lead to self-motivation and control over your life.

5 Tips and Motivation Hints to Start Your Fitness Routine This Fall!

2008-12-18T22:49:00.001-08:00

by: Lynn VanDyke

The crispness of autumn’s air settles in after a long summer of hot and humid weather. The leaves begin to turn vibrant colors and the children head back to school. Adults settle back into their regular routines and begin preparing for the upcoming winter months. If you’re like most adults, one of your priorities is to lose weight and tone up. Perhaps you want to drop a few dress sizes or add a few pounds of lean muscle. Whatever your goal may be this season, here are a few tips that will jumpstart your fat loss: 1) Eat 5-6 small meals throughout the day. Each meal should be 2-3 hours apart. Each meal should contain one protein and one carb. The first meal should be eaten within an hour after waking. 2) Drink a cup of water at each meal. 3) Rest properly. This means taking at least 48 hours between strength training the same muscles, and it also means getting at least 7-8 hours of sleep per night. Lastly, it means taking 1-2 days off from exercising per week. 4) Cardio should be done at different intensity levels and different session lengths. Consider doing a low intensity/long session, a high intensity/short session and a few medium intensity/medium length sessions. 5) Strength train each muscle 1-3 times per week. You should lift a proper weight and perform the proper amount of sets/reps for your strength training method. If you need more guidance or exercise ideas you can search the web. Try using the search term “strength training woman” or “strength training men” to narrow down your results. Include the quotation marks for best results. It is possible for us to begin the autumn season and start checking things off of our “To Do” list. The secret to successful fitness programs lies in correct execution. Non-stop dieting or crash course fitness regimes will not help you achieve lasting fat loss. There are many ways to keep your motivation strong through the fall and winter months. Here are a few that you can begin using right now: - Join a gym and talk with a personal trainer about your specific goals. - Find a workout buddy. - Create a fitness and nutrition journal. Log your daily food intake and workout program. Also note your moods and feelings. Contact me for a free workout log. - Invest in an ebook. An ebook is an electronic book that many fitness professionals are creating. The ebook should be authored by a master trainer and offer you a complete program on fitness and nutrition. Having a complete guide by a master trainer is one of the cheapest and best ways to succeed. Whether your goal is to slim down or bulk up, combining the 5 tips above with a focused fitness and nutrition program is the absolute best path to long-lasting fat loss. Should you have any questions, please feel free to contact me. Your success depends on you!

The Secret to Self-Motivation:Tips for Online Entrepreneurs & Network Marketer

2008-12-18T22:47:00.000-08:00

by: Jamie Jefferson

If you are a home business owner, you know the importance of staying motivated. And you also know that, some days, it's more difficult than others.
But success is based on consistent and persistent effort, so staying inspired and enthusiastic is an essential key to success.
Here are four important tips for keeping motivation high:
1. Write out your "why" and read it often.
I like to call this my "Vision Statement." The Laptop Lifestyle really is so rewarding. I often wonder how anyone can be entirely satisfied without it. To have a completely mobile and flexible business offers a pretty amazing quality of life. Get excited about this every single day.
Imagine what changes in your life will result from this level of success. You can be home with your children, never miss another ball game, and do exactly what you like, when you like.
Really feel the "fire in your belly" and the excitement for the financial opportunities and the amazing lifestyle that is before you.
Write out all the reasons why you are working to build your own business from home. Then post your vision statement where you can see it and re-read it at least daily.
2. Use the science of success to keep you motivated.
Find a personal growth learning system that works well for you, whether it's seminars, books, CDs, or online training. Success University, for example, has monthly achievement courses, which break down important training courses into 10 to 15 minute increments each day, ( http://save.successuniversity.com ) as well as streaming audio and video courses so that you can take a break from your work and get re-inspired at the same time.
These SU breaks have been instrumental to my success. Specific training on success principles, goal-setting, and marketing/promotion can keep you working at an efficient and productive pace.
3. Re-pattern your self-talk.
A huge factor of my success has been my imagining that I've already achieved the goal ahead of time. Spend time visualizing your success, including how it will feel, and remind yourself that you deserve the time and freedom that you are working toward. Act like you already have it, and you soon will.
Remember to write your affirmations and your vision statement in the present tense (not the future tense). You are responsible for telling your subconscious mind what it should believe. Tell yourself you make a lot of money and help a lot of people achieve their goals, and it will begin to become a reality for you. It might sound very airy-fairy, but it really does work.
4. Take some time off.
This is a really hard one for me because I so love what I do. But I also know that taking short breaks throughout the day and even a day off every now and then is crucial. I always come back to my computer with renewed vigor and tons more ideas.
It's no accident that many great ideas are born in the shower -- because this is a place where we have stepped away from our thoughts and begin to relax a bit. When we take a break, we see our ideas from a broader perspective and we can make sure that the direction we're speeding off in is the right one. And that can save lots of time in the long run.
Here's to your success!

Exercise Tips -- Motivation May Not Be #1 Key

2008-12-18T22:34:00.000-08:00

by:Brad Howard

I help people all of the time with different problems when it comes to their workouts (and even life sometimes). Many of those times, these distinct problems are attributed to a much larger situation. I am a HUGE believer of getting to the source of a problem and NOT just treating symptoms.
Treating symptoms never lets the person understand what is actually going on and can be very self defeating. Imagine for a minute that you are allergic to peanut butter. Now, you love peanut butter so you get a medicine to let you eat peanut butter to your heart's content.
Of course, the medicine costs money and carries all sorts of side effects. Wouldn't it make more sense to just give up peanut butter? After all, it's the peanut butter that is the source of your problems. Taking the medicine is just an unnecessary step.
So, the best thing to do in most instances revolves around the source of a problem. But, for people trying to get in better shape, what are the primary problem sources? What exercise tips prove to really pay off?
Honestly, most of the underlying problems involve psychology and the way people perceive things. The leftover problems stem from either overflowing or faulty information.
Today, I want to go over motivation and why it might not necessarily be the 1st thing to focus on when beginning a new program.
Follow me here. (I'll get to the correlation at the end)
I think most people can relate to this.
You have an underperforming employee. Generally speaking, underperforming employees tend to fall into two categories -- those that need more training and those that have significant training but need to be motivated (I usually let these people go by the way as they tend to be a drain on the team).
Most of the time, an underperforming person gets lumped into the "I need motivation" category prematurely. However, looking further, we can see that our employee really just needs more training to ensure more confidence.
But, what do we do?
We say, "Oh, you just need to be more motivated" or "come on, just think about how much money you can make." Then, our "motivated" individual goes out, does a crappy job, gets discouraged, and then falls back into the same trap as before. It's a vicious cycle. (By the way, if you have an employee like this, chances are they need more training. It's a clear sign that you haven't been doing YOUR job, instead of them not doing theirs).
Think about it this way, if you have an idiot and you motivate them you don't get a lean, mean, employee: you've got yourself a motivated idiot! Imagine what kind of destructive power that can have.
I've digressed a little. What does this have to do with working out?
A LOT!
If you are doing all of the wrong things and you get more motivated (i.e. work harder, more weight, reps, intensity), you are going to trash your body, period.
Think about the motivated idiot.
Now, I'm not saying to get into information overload by any means. The easiest thing to do would be to grab a magazine or two from the grocery store and start with a few of the workouts inside. That way, you don't have to worry about your plan and can actually GET MOTIVATED with the right information.
This is very important.
Now, if this does not sound appealing, put something together yourself and get it critiqued by a qualified individual before you start. You might have a great majority of it right and realize drastic improvements with a few small tweaks.
Search out reputable sources (don't "diet" Google) and follow their advice.
**IMPORTANT**
Do not pick 15 people to follow and mash all of their teachings together. Pick one and follow him/her only. When you try to put more than one system together, you not only diffuse the power of the system, you put yourself into potential information overload from all of the different "exercise tips".
Again, do some research and find one person to focus on. You'll see quicker results from your simple approach.

Simple Tips Teaching Literacy By Nadia Distel

2008-07-22T23:56:00.000-07:00

Teaching Literacy
There are lots of different strategies for teaching literacy, and the way you do it will largely depend on your curriculum and the age of the students you are teaching. Some hints I would give you to apply to all grade levels of the primary school include:
 Tap student's interest as much as possible. Let them read, write and speak about things that are interesting to them, and you will have greater motivation and therefore a greater effort and finished product!
 Play games as much as you can to reinforce spelling, sight words and other literacy concepts.
 Laminate all your language resources so you can use them multiple times through the year, over multiple years
 When teaching spelling, make sure you focus on the sound of the word, the shape of the word and the look of the word - that means that all learning styles are accommodated and included!
 Buddy less capable students with more capable students for support when writing
 Have a good supply of kid friendly dictionaries on hand for students to use when confronted with spelling difficulty
 Try using a 'Personal Words' list for spelling to keep your program individualized and the students interested
 Enlist the support of parents to hear students read each day
 Try to get involved in a course called 'Reading Recovery' - it will really help you when working with children who find reading difficult.

Relationship Alert: Discover how this common habit can ruin your relationship By Dr. Richard Nicastro

2008-07-22T23:53:00.000-07:00

There are times when it's helpful to use compare and contrast thinking. For example, fifth-grade Social Studies. Remember when Mrs. Dogoody assigned the paper: "Compare and Contrast Ancient Roman and Ancient Greek Civilizations"? (I do; I still have the occasional nightmare about that one.) The logic behind this type of assignment is that we learn about one topic by discovering the similarities and differences between it and another topic (thereby learning about both). Sounds good on paper, right? It may work in school, but you need to drop this way of thinking when you enter a relationship and want to learn about your partner.
The problem with comparing people:
People are always comparing themselves to others. It becomes a habit and is often so automatic that you might not even be aware you're doing it. However, just because it's common, doesn't mean it's good for us. Sages through the years have been warning us that all unhappiness stems from comparing ourselves to others.
Comparing and contrasting yourself to others creates the illusion that you are either inferior or superior. Often the goal of this type of thinking is self-enhancement, where you begin to define and feed your sense of self in relationship to other people. This is a house of cards that will result in your energies being senselessly drained, since you will need to continuously feed your ego with meaningless comparisons. Depression, envy, jealousy, hostility, and chronic feelings of dissatisfaction often result from compare and contrast thinking.
Criticalness: Comparison thinking in disguise
One prominent and overt form of comparison thinking is criticalness. Whenever you criticize another, you are implying that the other person is wrong and that you would never behave that way (therefore you are morally superior and a better person for not behaving in that way). Often the motivation of criticism is an attempt to elevate yourself above another person.
Unfortunately, criticalness often becomes a stubborn part of many marriages and romantic relationships. Marriage researcher John Gottman found that criticalness is one of the important factors that results in marital dissatisfaction.
When one partner becomes critical of another, the person who feels under attack creates a protective shield around him/herself to numb the sting of the critical remarks. This pattern of offense/defense can develop into a chronic cycle of criticism and defensiveness, leading to the erosion of intimacy.
There is a significant difference between disagreeing with your partner and being critical. When you disagree, you are saying that you see things differently from your partner and that you have different viewpoints about something. When you criticize, you attack your partner and take the comparative stance of being better than him/her.
To become aware of the role of compare and contrast thinking in your life and in your relationship, take the following challenge:
I invite you to monitor your thinking for one week. Simply be mindful of the thoughts you are having, especially while interacting with others. To help you stay on task, you can keep a journal of all your thoughts. During this exercise be aware of all comparisons (comparisons are sometimes subtle) that come to mind. I think you'll be surprised by the prevalence of compare and contrast thinking in your daily life.
Becoming truly aware of your mental patterns is the first step in changing your thinking. When you recognize compare and contrast thinking at work in your own mind, talk yourself out of that destructive approach by reminding yourself that it's not your job to judge others or evaluate yourself alongside themâ€"your job is to discover your own inherent self-worth, which will open you up to peaceful and meaningful relationships with others.

Do You Have An Employee Retention Strategy That Also Increases Employee Motivation? by Bob Urichuck

2008-07-18T09:45:00.000-07:00

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The common element was people and how management relates to employee retention and employee motivation, no matter what area they worked in.

Everyone agreed that it is the people, and their attitudes that make the difference. Finally, we concluded that it is you, the management team that has to first make the difference in employee retention and employee motivation. Therefore, let's look inside.

You can't have something on the outside if you don't first have it on the inside. In other words you cannot attract good employees if you don't first have the right attitude towards your existing employees, provide a good working atmosphere, tools and growth opportunities.

So take a close look at your employee retention and employee motivation strategies, since they are both under your direct management influence.

Here are some of the team's top answers on employee retention and employee motivation:

Employee Retention ------------------ Keep your promises Build employees self-esteem Good access to management Training and Cross Training Staff events / Team building React on employee suggestions Regular staff meetings, parties Everyone is equal to each other

Employee motivation ------------------- Ongoing staff training Keep employees informed of status Frequent /consistent rewards and recognition for performance Set goals, review, evaluate, feedback Lead by example Mentoring programs Be sensitive to personal issues

When you take a close look at these two areas, you can see a lot of overlap. What you do to increase employee motivation also applies to employee retention and vice versa.

Some of the main areas of employee retention and employee motivation that are commonly overlooked are orientation training, the establishment of team and individual goals, having ongoing reviews and providing constructive feedback.

Without these elements the employee is wandering around aimlessly, and doesn't get any feedback on their performance. How can you expect the employee to meet or exceed your expectations if they don't know what they are or how they are doing in relation to your expectations?

In a previous article that I wrote, I pointed out what motivated employees the most and how employee retention and loyalty faired out based on the results of National research study.

The three top elements were:

1.Full appreciation of work done 2.Feeling of being in on things 3.Help on personal problems

Full appreciation of work done is recognition. Recognition is positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement of actions gets those actions repeated. Recognition and praise reinforces our beliefs about ourselves, and helps make us think we are better than we may have thought we were.

Positive reinforcement is what builds our self-esteem. Our self-esteem is the way we see and feel about ourselves either internally, through our own beliefs, or externally through what we accept as the beliefs of others. If we feel good about ourselves and we believe others feel good about us, we perform better than we would when we see the opposite side of the coin.

People perform in a manner that is consistent with how they see themselves conceptually. So, the key is to help people build their self-esteem. This is an important employee retention and employee motivation discipline.

You cannot motivate another person to do anything. We all know we could only accomplish so much on our own and that everyone is a product of their environment. You have the opportunity to create the environment.

You can only provide the means and the atmosphere in which others motivate themselves. You are the leader and you must set the example by demonstrating appropriate behaviors. Take the time to define the appropriate behaviors you want to see in your employees, then start demonstrating them. This is an important employee retention and employee motivation discipline.

By bringing all employees together in a room for a meeting you create a team environment. By including them and sharing information with them, you are giving your employees an opportunity to share your perspective.

With inclusion, you are indirectly empowering them to contribute to the success of your whole operation, because it gives them a chance to see and understand the bigger picture. This in turn leads to them taking initiative and improving things in their own area of responsibility, particularly if they are recognized for it.

By sharing the results of the period with them and asking them what went well and what areas could use some improvement, you are obtaining a wealth of information, and including them in the overall success of your operation.

What do you think will happen when it comes time to implement some of their suggestions? Do you think they will object, or, do you think they might take ownership in implementing them beyond your expectations?

This is an important employee retention and employee motivation discipline.

What about personal problems, do you take the time to listen, to understand, to show you care?

Personal problems often interfere with work performance. Take the time to help your employee with their personal problems. Coach them to look for solutions and they will feel closer to you. In turn, they will perform better because you showed you care.

People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care. This is an important employee retention and employee motivation discipline.

From this point on you will notice that employees will go out of their way to do a great job, because you took the time to include them, empower them, to thank them and to show them that you care. This is an important employee retention and employee motivation discipline.

The Bottom Line: Actions that get recognized or rewarded get repeated. Are you demonstrating appropriate behaviours in your employee retention and employee motivation strategies?

Four Steps To Greater Motivation At Work by Trevor Hill

2008-07-18T09:34:00.000-07:00

Motivation

2008-07-14T21:11:00.000-07:00

Motivation is a piviotal concept in most theories of learning. It is closely related to arousal, attention, anxiety, and feedback/reinforcement. For example, a person needs to be motivated enough to pay attention while learning; anxiety can decrease our motivation to learn. Receiving a reward or feedback for an action usually increases the likelihood that the action will be repreated. Weiner (1990) points out that behavioral theories tended to focus on extrinsic motivation (i.e., rewards) while cognitive theories deal with intrinsic motivation (i.e., goals) .
In most forms of behaviorial theory, motivation was strictly a function of primary drives such as hunger, sex, sleep, or comfort. According to Hull's drive reduction theory, learning reduces drives and therefore motivation is essential to learning. The degree of the learning achieved can be manipulated by the strength of the drive and its underlying motivation. In Tolman's theory of purposive behaviorism, primary drives create internal states (i.e., wants or needs) that serve as secondary drives and represent instrinsic motivation.
In cognitive theory, motivation serves to create intentions and goal-seeking acts (see Ames & Ames, 1989). One well-developed area of research highly relevant to learning is achievement motivation (e.g., Atkinson & Raynor, 1974; Weiner). Motivation to achieve is a function of the individual's desire for success, the expectancy of success, and the incentives provided. Studies show that in general people prefer tasks of intermediate difficulty. In addition, students with a high need to achieve, obtain better grades in courses which they perceive as highly relevant to their career goals. On the other hand, according to Rogers, all individuals have a drive to self-actualize and this motivates learning.
Malone (1981) presented a theoretical framework for instrinsic motivation in the context of designing computer games for instruction. Malone argues that instrinsic motivation is created by three qualities: challenge, fantasy, and curosity. Challenge depends upon activities that involve uncertain outcomes due to variable levels, hidden information or randomness. Fantasy should depend upon skills required for the instruction. Curiosity can be aroused when learners believe their knowledge structures are incomplete, inconsistent, or unparsimonious. According to Malone, instrinsically motivating activities provide learners with a broad range of challenge, concrete feedback, and clear-cut criteria for performance.
Keller (1983) presents an instructional design model for motivation that is based upon a number of other theories. His model suggests a design strategy that encompasses four components of motivation: arousing interest, creating relevance, developing an expectancy of success, and producing satisfaction through intrinsic/extrinsic rewards.
References:
Ames, C. & Ames, R. (1989). Research in Motivation in Education, Vol 3. San Diego: Academic Press.
Atkinson, J. & Raynor, O. (1974). Motivation and Achievement. Washington: Winston.
Keller, J. (1983). Motivational design of instruction. In C. Riegeluth (ed.), Instructional Design Theories and Models. Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.
Malone, T. (1981). Towards a theory of instrinsically motivating instruction. Cognitive Science, 4, 333-369.
McClelland, D. (1985). Human Motivation. Glenview, IL: Scott, Foresman.
Weiner, B. (1990). History of motivational research in education. Journal of Educational Psychology, 82(4), 616-622.

Motivation & Leadership

2008-07-14T21:09:00.000-07:00

Men wanted for hazardous journey. Small wages, bitter cold, long months of complete darkness, constant danger, safe return doubtful. Honor and recognition in case of success. - Explorer Ernest Shackleston in a 1890 job ad for the first Antarctic expedition. A person's motivation is a combination of desire and energy directed at achieving a goal. Influencing someone's motivation means getting them to want to do what you know must be done. A person's motivation depends upon two things:
The strength of certain needs. For example, you are hungry, but you must have a task completed by a nearing deadline. If you are starving you will eat. If you are slightly hungry you will finish the task at hand.
The perception that taking a certain action will help satisfy those needs. For example, you have two burning needs - The desire to complete the task and the desire to go to lunch. Your perception of how you view those two needs will determine which one takes priority. If you believe that you could be fired for not completing the task, you will probably put off lunch and complete the task. If you believe that you will not get into trouble or perhaps finish the task in time, then you will likely go to lunch. People can be motivated by such forces as beliefs, values, interests, fear, and worthy causes. Some of these forces are internal, such as needs, interests, and beliefs. Others are external, such as danger, the environment, or pressure from a loved one. There is no simple formula for motivation -- you must keep a open viewpoint on human nature. There is a complex array of forces steering the direction of each person and these forces cannot always be seen or studied. In addition, if the same forces are steering two different people, each one may act differently. Knowing that each person may react to different needs will guide your decisions and actions in certain situations.
As a leader you have the power to influence motivation. The following guidelines (U.S. Army Handbook, 1973) form a basic view of motivation. They will help guide your decision making process:
Allow the needs of your team to coincide with the needs of your organization. Nearly everyone is influenced by the needs for job security, promotion, raises, and approval of their peers and/or leaders. They are also influenced by internal forces such as values morals, and ethics. Likewise, the organization needs good people in a wide variety of jobs. Ensure that your team is trained, encouraged, and has opportunities to advance. Also, ensure that the way you conduct business has the same values, moral, and ethic principles that you seek in others. If you conduct business in a dishonest manner, your team will be dishonest to you, for that will be the kind of people that you will attract.
Reward good behavior. Although a certificate, letter, or a thank you may seem small and insignificant, they can be powerful motivators. The reward should be specific and prompt. Do not say something general, such as "for doing a good job," rather cite the specific action that made you believe it was indeed a good job. In addition, help those who are good. We all make mistakes or need help on an occasion to achieve a particular goal.
Set the example. You must be the role model that you want others to grow into.
Develop moral and esprit de corps. Moral is the mental, emotional, and spiritual state of a person. Almost everything you do will have an impact on your organization. You should always be aware how your actions and decisions might affect it. Esprit de corps means team spirit - it is defined as the spirit of the organization or collective body (in French it literally means "spirit of the body"). It is the consciousness of the organization that allows the people within it to identify with and feel a part of. Is your workplace a place where people cannot wait to get away from; or is it a place that people enjoy spending a part of their lives?
Allow your team to be part of the planning and problem solving process. This helps with their development and allows you to coach them. Secondly, it motivates them -- people who are part of the decision making process become the owners of it, thus it gives them a personal interest in seeing the plan succeed. thirdly, communication is clearer as everyone has a better understanding of what role they must play as part of the team. Next, it creates an open trusting communication bond. They are no longer just the doers for the organization -- they are now part of it! Finally, recognition and appreciation from a respected leader are powerful motivators.
Look out for your team. Although you do not have control over their personal lives, you must show concern for them. Things that seem of no importance to you might be extremely critical to them. You must be able to empathize with them. This is from the German word, einfuhling, which means "to feel with", or the ability to perceive another person's view of the world as though that view were your own. The Sioux Indian Tribal Prayer reads, "Great Spirit, help us never to judge another until we have walked for two weeks in his moccasins." Also note that empathy differs from sympathy in that sympathy connotes spontaneous emotion rather than a conscious, reasoned response. Sympathizing with others may be less useful to another person if we are limited by the strong feelings of the moment.
Keep them informed. Keeping the communication channel open allows a person to have a sense of control over their lives.
Make their jobs challenging, exciting, and meaningful. Make each feel like an individual in a great team...rather than a cog in a lifeless machine. People need meaningful work, even if it is tiring and unpleasant; they need to know that it is important and necessary for the survival of the organization.
Counsel people who behave in a way that is counter to the company's goals. All the guidelines before this took the positive approach. But, sometimes this does not always work. You must let people know when they are not performing to an acceptable standard. By the same token, you must protect them when needed. For example, if someone in your department is always late arriving for work and it is causing disruptions, then you must take action. On the other hand, if you have an extremely good department and once in a while they are a few minutes late, then do the right thing...protect them from the bureaucracy!
Counseling

Counseling has a powerful, long-term impact on people and the effectiveness of the organization. Counseling is talking with a person in a way that helps him or her solve a problem. It involves thinking, implementing, knowing human nature, timing, sincerity, compassion, and kindness. It involves much more that simply telling someone what to do about a problem.
Leaders must demonstrate the following qualities in order to counsel effectively.
Respect for employees - This includes the belief that individuals are responsible for their own actions and ideas. It includes an awareness of a person's individuality by recognizing their unique values, attributes, and skills. As you attempt to develop people with counseling, you must refrain from projecting your own values onto them.
Self-Awareness - This quality is an understanding of yourself as a leader. The more you are aware of your own values, needs, and biases, the less likely you will be to project your feelings onto your employees.
Credibility - Believability is achieved through both honesty and consistency between both the leader's statements and actions. Credible leaders are straightforward with their subordinates and behave in such a manner that earns the subordinates' respect and trust.
Empathy - or compassion entails understanding a subordinates situation. Empathetic leaders will be better able to help subordinates identify the situation and then develop a plan to improve it. The reason for counseling is to help employees develop in order to achieve organizational goals. At times, the counseling is directed by policy, and at other times, leaders should choose to counsel to develop employees. Regardless of the nature of the counseling, leaders should demonstrate the qualities of an effective counselor (respect, self-awareness, credibility, and empathy) and employ the skills of good communication.
While the reason for counseling is to develop subordinates, leaders often categorize counseling based on the topic of the session. Major categories include performance counseling, problem counseling, and individual growth counseling (development). While these categories help leaders to organize and focus counseling sessions, they must not be viewed as separate and distinct types of counseling. For example a counseling session which mainly focuses on resolving a problem may also have a great impact on improving job performance. Another example is a counseling session that focuses on performance may also include a discussion of opportunities for growth. Regardless of the topic of the counseling session, you should follow the same basic format to prepare for and conduct counseling.
Steps for counseling
Identify the problem. Ensure you get to the heart of the problem. The Japanese use a practice called the Five Whys. They ask "why" five times when confronted with a problem -- by the time the fifth why is answered, they believe they have found the ultimate cause of the problem.
Analyze the forces influencing the behavior. Determine which of these forces you have control over and which of the forces the worker has control over. Determine if the force has to be modified, eliminated, or enforced.
Plan, coordinate, and organize the session. Determine the best time to conduct the session so that you will not be interrupted or forced to end too early.
Conduct the session using sincerity, compassion, and kindness. This does not mean you cannot be firm or in control. Your reputation is on the line...the problem must be solved so that your department can continue with its mission. Likewise, you must hear the person out.
During the session, determine what the worker believes causes the counter productive behavior and what will be required to change it. Also, determine if your initial analysis is correct.
Try to maintain a sense of timing of when to use directive or nondirective counseling (see below).
Using all the facts, make a decision and/or a plan of action to correct the problem. If more counseling is needed, make a firm time and date for the next session.
After the session and throughout a sufficient time period evaluate the worker's progress to ensure the problem has indeed been solved. There are two type of counseling - directive and nondirective. In directive counseling, the counselor identifies the problem and tells the counselee what to do about it. Nondirective counseling means the counselee identifies the problem and determines the solution with the help of the counselor. The counselor has to determine which of the two, or some appropriate combination, to give for each situation. For example, "Put that cigarette out now as this is a nonsmoking area," is a form of directive counseling. While a form of nondirective counseling would be, "So the reason you are not effective is that you were up late last night. What are you going to do to ensure that this does not effect your performance again?"
Hints for counseling sessions:
Let the person know that the behavior is undesirable, not the person.
Let the person know that you care about him or her as a person, but that you expect more from them.
Do not punish employees who are unable to perform a task. Punish those who are able to perform the task but are unwilling or unmotivated to succeed.
Counseling sessions should be conducted in private immediately after the undesirable behavior. Do not humiliate a person in front of others.
Ensure that the employee understands exactly what behavior led to the counseling or punishment.
Do not hold a grudge. When it is over...it is over! Move on!
Performance AppraisalsThe performance appraisal or evaluation is one of the most powerful motivational tools available to a leader. It has three main objectives:
To measure performance fairly and objectively against job requirements. This allows effective workers to be rewarded for their efforts and ineffective workers to be put on the line for poor performance.
To increase performance by identifying specific development goals. "If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there" - Lewis Carrol. The appraisal allows the worker to target specific areas for job growth...it should be a time to plan for better performance on the job.
To develop career goals so that the worker may keep pace with the requirements of a fast paced organization. More and more, every job in an organization becomes more demanding with new requirements. Just because a worker is performing effectively in her job today, does not mean she will be able to perform effectively tomorrow. She must be allowed to grow with the job and the organization. A lot of people consider giving performance appraisals as being quite uncomfortable. However, it is not the judging of people that is really uncomfortable, rather it is the judging of bad performance that is uncomfortable. Thus, eliminate poor performance in the first place, and performance appraisals become a lot more pleasant to give. Now of course you are not going to eliminate poor performances completely, however, with a little bit of planning they can be greatly reduced.
Performance has often been described as "purposeful work" -- that is, a job exists to achieve specific and defined results. And what bad performers really do is perform "work activities" (busy work), rather than activities that contributes to effective performance.
The first step in performance planning is to determine the results that you want the performer to achieve. After all, workers generally want to know what they need to do, how well you need them to do it, and how well they are actually doing it (feedback).
In addition, a worker should not walk blindly into a performance appraisal. Past counseling sessions, feedback, and one-on-ones should give her a pretty clear understanding of what to expect from the appraisal. If you blind-side her, you have not done your job as a leader. Helping your team grow is not a once or twice yearly task, but a full-time duty.
The appraisal should be a joint effort. No one knows the job better than the person performing it. By turning the appraisal into a real discussion, rather than a lecture, the leader may learn some insightful information that could help boost his or her performance in the future. Before the meeting, have the worker complete her own self-appraisal. Although you might think they will take advantage of this by giving themselves unearned high marks, studies have shown that most workers rate themselves more critically than the leader would have.
Should Performance Appraisals be Scrapped?There has been some talk of completely doing away with performance appraisals as they sometimes do more harm that they cause. Yet performance appraisals are tools and like any other tool, they can be used correctly or incorrectly. Part of the problem might be with its name -- "Performance Appraisal", which has sort of a judgmental sound to it; perhaps "Performance Planning and Review" might be a better term for it.
Part-time employees at Trader Joe's are reviewed every three months, which is an unusually frequent rate of evaluation (Speizer, 2004). In addition, the part-time employees of Trader Joe's are paid higher wages, as are their full-time workers, than what you will find in the normal grocery store (an average of $16 per hour vs $12).

What is interesting about all of this is that they have been bought three times, and NOT because they are losing money -- they make more money per square foot of business than the average grocery store. The new leadership teams have never said that they need to pay them what the rest of the industry pays. Why? Because they see the value in their workers! Rather than giving lip-service to "employees our are most valuable asset", they actually walk-the-talk.
Yet, one of the arguments for scrapping performance appraisals is that ALL workers' pay should be aligned with the labor market -- they do not deserve annual pay raises as it inflates the wage and salary structure.
Traditionally, roles have remained the same while goals change (Buchen, 2004). Yet, due to the rapid changes that occur on a day-to-day basis, the roles are actually changing, even though they might remained fixed on paper. Performance appraisals often fail to factor in the changing relationships between goals and roles that are often in a high state of metamorphosis. That is, our attention remains fixed on steadfast goals, while ignoring ever-changing roles.
This type of thinking shows up in a lot of industries as they view their workers' jobs as set roles, even though the world is rapidly changing. For example, the 2004 grocery strike in California forced many shoppers to look at alternatives, thus they started shopping at Traders Joe's (who were not part of the strike). And many of these shoppers never went back to their regular stores (who see their employees playing traditional roles) because they enjoy the experience they have at Trader Joe's. Yet Trader Joe's was not always like this -- it started out more like a Seven-Eleven, but because of the competition it went in search of its present niche and recognized along the way that its employee's roles also needed to change. So even though they still deal in the same commodity as the larger grocery stores -- food -- they not only changed the way they bought food (goal), but also in they way they deliver that food to the customer (role).
Thus, the real argument is not really about scrapping PAs, but rather ensuring that once goals are set, that all roles are properly accounted for so that the target can indeed be met.
Reference[Tags: Motivation Performance Counseling ]
Buchen, Irving. Upgrading Performance and Targeting Learning. Chief Learning Officer July 2004.
Craig, Robert L. (1996). The ASTD Training and Development Handbook. New York: McGraw-Hill.
Eliza G. C. Collins & Mary Anne Devanna (1990). The Portable MBA. New York: John Wiley and Sons.
Speizer, Irwin Recruiting and Staffing. Workforce Magazine. September 2004, pp. 51-54.
U.S. Army Handbook (1973). Military Leadership. Return

Weight Loss Motivation - Approaching Weight Loss With a Positive Attitude By Jackle Reid

2008-07-14T20:48:00.000-07:00

If you are just entering a weight loss program you might find that you are overwhelm with information and not sure where to start but do not be discouraged.
The wealth of information on weight loss is good because it guarantee that you will never be without information to reach your weight loss goal.
Weight loss as with any other thing that you desire, to take on in life but be done with a positive attitude going in. Don't think that you will get on a weight loss program and you will lose weight and you will never have any weight loss challenge.
One of the reasons why some people become a weight loss success is because they plan for the time that they will have a set back and put in the necessary actions in their weight loss plan so that when a challenge comes they are already prepared to deal with it.
However, when you start on a weight loss plan you must realize that you will need some tools to help your along your journey. The first thing that you will need is a weight loss journal. This journal will become your biggest friend. Some of the things that you will be recording in your weight loss journal includes:
1. Take a before picture of yourself. You will never really remember what you looked like before your weight loss journey.
2. Measure yourself. This step is quite important because though you take a picture, a picture will not tell you what the measurement of your waist was before you start your weight loss program.
3. Set a weight loss goal that you want to achieve. For example lose 10 pounds in 3 weeks. Once you have your weight loss goal, give it a start date and an end date
4. Make a commitment to yourself that you will start on the date that you said you would and end on the date that you would. Sign it and date it. You have now made a commitment with yourself
5. Start writing down all the foods that you are eating through the day. Every piece that goes in your mouth.
6. Write down when you are eating, you might find that you might be an emotional eater and eating when you are angry, upset or stressed and not because you are hungry
7. Block out some time to go over your writing and see where you can make improvements on your food choices.
Once you start writing in your weight loss journal you will begin to see patterns in how you eat, what you eat and when you eat. Spend time making adjustment to your eating habits and seek a support system that will get you to lose the weight. Your weight loss journal will be your first buddy system but by joining some type of weight loss support group you will find that you are able to stay on the course and get to that weight loss goal that you desire.

Memory Improvement Skils Can Be yours Today By Adam Eason

2008-07-14T20:39:00.000-07:00

Have you wanted to know more memory improvement skills? Does it fascinate you to think that there are memory improvement skills that can be yours today? Want to know how some very simple strategies can enhance your memory beyond belief? Read on...
Have you ever seen someone in town and you knew you should know there name but could not recall it? Have you ever gone to dial a telephone number that you dialled hundreds of times before and just could not remember? Did you ever walk into a room but forgot what you went to do?
In these situations we can sometimes feel useless, distracted and unable to connect with our brain properly. That phenomena that is often referred to as 'tip of the tongue.' Then maybe your memory improvement skills need working on!
In July 1998 the University of Florida published some research findings that showed that elderly people should ignore stereotypes about memory loss.
Older people are much less likely to have major problems with their memory improvement skills if they believe in themselves and work to improve their recall, this University of Florida study finds.
The elderly are more likely than younger people to buy into the stereotype that they can't control their memory, and it affects not only their self-esteem but also how hard they try to remember, said Robin West, a University of Florida psychology professor who did the research.
In the study conducted by psychology graduate student Monica Yassuda, more than 200 older and young adults were divided into two groups. One group was told memory is a skill that can be improved with effort, and the other group that the ability to remember is fixed forever at birth, she said.
"There is some indication in the literature that older people tend to see memory as something they can't control -- you either have a good memory or you don't," West said.
"The results show that we need to encourage older adults to think of themselves as a group that has the potential to have a better memory if they work at it," she said. Other studies, which were conducted by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation, have found the belief that people can control part of their lives is a good predictor of whether they age well mentally and physically, West said.
This way of looking at memory improvement skills of course does not have to only be applicable to the older generation, of course it applies to us all.
Let me give you some examples of things people say to me individually or in my seminars:
- "I do not have a good memory."
- "That is too much for me to remember."
- "I have a memory like a sieve."
- "I am afraid my memory is failing now that I am getting older."
My Granddad said something to me recently that really made me think. He and I were in his local village pub and we were joking about the fact that my Nana gave him a hard time for coming to the pub and ordered him not to drink too much, despite over 65 years of marriage.
My Nana has been quite ill for a number of years and she does not go out much and I mentioned to my Granddad that I noticed her struggling for her words every now and then, or struggling to remember a name and he said that it was nothing to do with her age, they are both well into their eighties, but rather it was that she has very little communication with others anymore. That was his opinion.
These quotes I just mentioned are beliefs but too often people say them as if they were facts. There are some very common misconceptions about memory and memory improvement skills: that it is an ability that cannot be changed; that you only have a certain amount; that it relates to age, and declines as we get older.
Memory is not about volume and it is not about content, it is about processes. It is about something we do, not something we have: it is about remembering.
Remembering is dependent on the connections we make between things. Imagine you are constructing an index. If you have referred to a book, or a person, by only one attribute, you will have only one data point and hence only one way of accessing that information. If you have used a number of different data points, each capturing a different aspect, you will have more ways to access this information.
Anyone can achieve enormous memory improvement by focusing on two particular aspects of memory: encoding and storage on the one hand and recall on the other. Today I write about encoding, next week I write about recall.
If you want to improve your ability to encode accurately and store information, you will need to check out your attitudes, beliefs and feelings:
Joan was an in-house business trainer who used to be great at remembering names. Over the past couple of years, she had come to resent an increasing workload and an ever-growing number of delegates. One day she was heard to say to a colleague: "There is no way I'm going to remember the names of all these delegates." Joan's feelings of disappointment and resentment were affecting her beliefs about how much she could remember - yet within her area of expertise she was quite capable of remembering vast bodies of information and new research. She did not actually want to remember the names of all the delegates, because in her view there were too many of them. Not surprisingly, she did find it difficult, though many years ago she had made it a matter of pride to learn all their names. But she had felt differently then.
So, consider how you think and feel about what it is you want to remember.
Feelings can affect encoding and storage in other ways too. Do you remember your first day at school? Many people do, often in considerable detail. But what about the second day? Probably not. The reason for this is that day one at school is a special day: you may have looked forward to it, or dreaded it; you may have a had a wonderful - or an awful - time. The teacher may have been really kind - or expected you to be able to do things that you had not yet learnt. The playground may have been a great place to run around in - or a terrifying place where giants a whole year older than you rushed past you and around you, yelling loudly and playing boisterously. There may have been a lot of feeling - and strong feelings can make for vivid encoding.
Therefore, engage your feelings to make what you want to remember vivid.
Routes to lost information; some memory improvment skills:
1. One way to recover information is to recall the circumstances in which you first gained it. Maybe it was the name of someone at a party? Or something you heard on the radio? Remind yourself of s many details as you can of that party, involving information from all sensory systems. Who did you talk to? Where were you sitting, or standing? What music was playing? And so on. As you fill in the context, you may find the detail you want pops up - or that search processes are triggered so that it pops up later.
2. Are you forgetting because you felt uncomfortable, uneasy or unhappy about something? If you need or wish to recover the information, pay attention to your feelings in the here-and-now and imagine they are like beads on a string. Very similar to the other times you have felt the same, feeling like this now is linked to all of the other times you have felt the same, feeling like this now is linked to all the other times and because the mind stores like things together, your attentiveness to these feelings now can lead you back along the string to the time and circumstances you forgot.
Paying attention as an integral part of your memory improvement skills:
From this day forward, think about how you encode every piece of information and how you experience life each day.
How much attention do you pay to the information you want to store? One of the most striking things about people who claim their memory is not very good is how good they are at remembering poorly! Suppose you are introduced to someone but as you are told their name you are pre-occupied. When later you try to remember their name all you can recall is what was bothering you then and what they looked like. In such circumstances there is nothing wrong with your memory. Your way of remembering - the process of encoding that you employed - has faithfully encoded exactly what was going on.
You were preoccupied and this meant you had your own internal dialogue running. So any additional auditory input - like the person's name - would be competing with your internally generated auditory signal. What they looked like is more memorable partly because visual data is generally easier to recall - it is more vivid - but also that element was less cluttered with internal signals at that moment.
What you attend to will affect what you actually commit to memory. So often, poor encoding is confused with poor memory. Be aware of this when looking to enhance those memory improvement skills.

Your Perfect Day, How Would It Be? By: Van Lint Ineke

2008-07-14T20:21:00.000-07:00

The perfect day of your life, how would it look like? How far away do you think you are from this perfect day? What can you do to make this perfect day reality? Let’s find out by doing the following exercice! The right side of your brain has retained the image of that you came here to do on this Earth. Your education and the influence of society have taught you to rely on the left side of your brain, and you have lost contact with the right side. But this contact can be easily restored. Your right side works with images. When you are imagining about your perfect life, the images that pop up come straight from the image archive room in the right side of the brain. These images of the perfect day and what you wish to do, your dreams, are not arbitrary. They are the reflection of your mission, your true task here on Earth. This mission is calling you and encourages you to discover it. Do this revealing exercice on paper : image the perfect day, even as you go about all your daily responsibilities. So it’s not a holiday at the beach! Describe as accurate and detailed as possible what you are doing, how you are doing it, what activities you are involved in, what people surround you, and so on. Let your imagination flow freely and do not limit yourself to the usual restrictions. Remember: this is an exercise of imagination. No need to take reality into account. You are free to fill in the blanks as you wish! Do make sure you are working in the environment of your choice, doing exactly what you like to do. See yourself using your main talents and feeling a deep sense of enthusiasm offering your key talents to other people around you. Visualize how your job gives you total satisfaction. Ask yourself: “If I loved myself, how would I spend my day?” Come up with as many practical details as possible: what time are you getting up, what are you wearing, what are you having for breakfast, do you commute to work or do you work at home, what’s your job exactly, from when to when are you working, where and with whom do you take lunch, etc. Detail the entire perfect day right until the moment you go back to sleep. Write in the present tense, as if you were living the perfect day right now. Do not use negative words like : not, no, without… Important : write down your perfect day, so you can read it over again. Take at least 15 minutes to do this exercice, you are worth it! What have you learned from doing this exercise? Could it be that your mission is already partially accomplished without you noticing it? Since you were able to write down your perfect day, where you use your talents and offer them to others, it must be that you are closer to that reality than you think! This exercise provides you with a clear image of your true mission. Have a look at your notes and make a guess about how close you are to this perfect day. Give it a note from 0 to 10. What can you do right now to get closer to 10/10? What do you need to change in your life to be able to live your perfect day, day after day? What does it need to live as if you loved yourself? What is withholding you? Is it a person, a belief, the circumstances? Don’t forget you create your own life, according to your belief system. If your life doesn’t match your perfect day, make some changes! You are worth it! Do this exercice every 3 to 6 months. Remember you don’t need to undergo circumstances. You are the creator of your life! Write down your perfect day on a regular base and do things to get closer to it. It’s all up to you!
The perfect day of your life, how would it look like? How far away do you think you are from this perfect day? What can you do to make this perfect day reality? Find it out here! Do the exercice and start living your perfect day, day after day.

Discover the Secret to Staying Motivated During Your Diet By Trudy Bannister

2008-07-14T02:04:00.000-07:00

What can you do about being better motivated to start and maintain your diet? Maybe you're reading this because you're 10, 15, 30 pounds or more overweight? You know if you don't lose the weight you can have some severe health issues and end up an invalid or worse; Dead! But you also know your will power to stick with what really may be a life saving diet is virtually nil o,r for all practical purposes, next to nothing. This article will offer tips on how you can improve your commitment to maintaining your diet and maybe even saving your on life.
You're well aware by now that your lack of motivation is the single most common reason you'll give up on a diet before you've even really started it. And because you donâ€™t see results in a day or two, itâ€™s gotten really difficult to even get started anymore. But you also know it is absolutely vital for you to stick with it for at least a month. And you also know that the first week is the hardest. I'm here to tell you that if you can just stick to your new diet and exercise for at least one week, it's going to become much easier from then on.
Of course, choosing the "right" diet can also make all the difference in the world. Diets that are too restrictive for too long would be difficult ever for the like of Gandhi, so - as Neo was told in the Matrix - choose wisely.
Making a change to a new diet is a big deal. You're literally changing your lifestyle. More than likely, if you were a bad eater before, you are going to have to give up a lot of food you enjoy.
This is the point where youll probably become the most discouraged. However, there is a way to overcome this discouragement. The key is to replace the enjoyment you used to get from food with other more healthy activities. Take the time to ride a bike with your children. Go for a walk with your partner. Enjoy the beauty of a sunset or sunrise. It sounds crazy and really simplistic, but you'll be pleasantly surprised how good these little things can make you feel.
Studies have shown that for a great many overweight people, junk food or excessive eating is an emotional problem rather than a physical problem. Therefore you're may need to consult a professional councilor to root out the problem. But once you know the real reason behind your weight problem, your motivation for getting rid the weight will skyrocket and the weight will start falling off.
To assist with your dieting motivation consider getting your mind off food altogether. When you stop thinking about food you'ill be surprised how your cravings for food will decrease. Keeping busy is the one key to sticking to a diet, and this means taking up hobbies or reaching out to others. Find a passion in your life and the cravings for food may seem like a distant memory.
Results from dieting can often be slow to materialize. But donâ€™t let that ruin your motivation! You can speed up the weight loss process by combining it with exercise, with the result being even faster weight loss. In my own case, I lost 37 pounds in the months of November and December (yikes!), and the majority of that weight didn't come off until the last month. The first 2 weeks I only lost 3 pounds.
Once you do start seeing results, though, your motivation can sky rocket. It's this first indication of your new body to come that literally makes you never want to go back to your old bad habits. The first time you truly get a glimpse of what your body is going to look like in the end, having motivation is rarely a problem.
So, what else can you do to motivate yourself to stick to that diet? Rewards are an excellent idea if you are still craving that chocolate cake or soft drink. It's not necessary for you to eliminate every single food or drink that you enjoy. The process of dieting is about reduction and moderation, not elimination.
Set yourself a goal to stick to your diet for 4 straight days, then on the 5th day you can enjoy some chocolate cake or ice cream (in moderation). When you know you'll be having a treat in a few days or so, rather than making it the forbidden fruit, it'll do amazing things for your motivation.
Dieting motivation is all in the mind; if you have control of your mind then you can also have control of your body! Just put it in your head that you're going to get through those first two weeks, not mater what. And remember, choose your diet wisely. I lost 37 pounds and still had a great Thanskgiving and Christmas feast, but I chose wisely. You can do the same. Don't give up!

7 Simple Steps to a More Self Confident Life By Wil Dieck

2008-07-14T01:45:00.000-07:00

Your self confidence affects just about everything in your life. How well you get along with people, your relationships with friends and family, as well as your job opportunities are all directly affected by how confident you feel about yourself. In fact, how confident you feel affects how well you enjoy your life!
People that donâ€™t feel good about themselves, people that lack self confidence, can find the prospect of a job interview terrifying. They experience poor relationships, if they have any real relationships at all. They find themselves in constant fear of losing their jobs because they arenâ€™t able to express themselves in front of their boss of in group situations.
Socially these people also struggle. How can they find someone to go out with when the mere idea of meeting new people petrifies them? Social events and encounters are painful illustrations of their lack of confidence.
Life doesnâ€™t have to be like this. With a change in perspective, a little help and some work, you can have the self confidence you desire. Here are seven simple steps to help you develop more self confidence.
1. Decide to make a Change
Once theyâ€™ve decided, nearly everyone finds making a change easier. Every change Iâ€™ve ever made, from getting in shape to learning how to be more personable, has been a result of deciding to make that change. All changes are relatively easy once youâ€™ve decided to make them. So if you think youâ€™d like to be more confident, make the decision to be more confident today. That leads us to step number two.
2. Why is it Important to You?
Once youâ€™ve made a decision to change, in this case deciding to become more confident, its time to figure out why itâ€™s important to you. Why specifically do you want more confidence? Is it so that you can speak up in meetings at work? Is it so that youâ€™ll be able to meet someone to go out with? Is it so youâ€™ll be able to learn better at school or play a sport better? Whatever it is you need to understand and define it so that you can motivate yourself with it. This leads to step three.
3. Make it a Goal
Hereâ€™s where the rubber meets the road. Many people know they need to change and decide to change. They know what result they want out of the change but they donâ€™t make it a goal. They wish their life would change, they think their life should change but they donâ€™t take the steps needed to make the change. When you make a goal you not only decide what you want your outcome to be but you also figure out the steps you will need to do to achieve it.
Now this canâ€™t be merely a mental exercise. In order to make your goal achievable you need to write down your outcome. Once youâ€™ve written down your outcome you need to write down the steps you need to do to achieve it. Writing down your goal and the steps you need to achieve it does two things for you. First it makes your goal a real tangible thing instead of merely a dream. Second, writing down the steps gives you the ability to make corrections as necessary to help you stay on track.
For example your outcome is to be able to speak up more in business meetings. Your outcome might be â€œI will express my opinion in every business meeting.â€ The steps you might outline to achieving this goal might be:
1. Prepare for meetings and know what topics are going to be discussed. 2. Talk to someone or find someone to model who speaks well at meetings you attend. (see step 4) 3. Prepare a one-line comment on one of the topics. 4. Practice what you will say in the theater of your mind (see step 5) 5. Express your comment at the meeting.
Now you have a goal that is achievable you might need some help. So that leads us to step 4. 4. Find Someone to Model
From the time we are babies we model other peopleâ€™s actions and behaviors. Have you ever done something and after noticing what youâ€™ve done said to yourself, â€œThat is exactly what my mother/father would have done?â€ That is a form of modeling, just at an unconscious level.
A more empowering form of modeling is when you find someone that has the characteristic(s) you want to have and purposefully model it. If you want to be able to speak well in front of groups, find someone who is good at speaking in front of groups and model her behavior. See how she stands, how she holds her head, how she speaks and uses her hands. If you are a man looking for a way to meet women, find a man who is already good at meeting women and model his behavior. What does he say? How does he dress? What are his mannerisms?
Whatever it is, there are lots of models to choose from. They include friends, acquaintances, family members, professional coaches, training videos and just about anyone else on the planet. An important point to remember is that the best model is one you like and you are able to adapt your own personality to.
Once you have someone to model its time for step five.
5. Visualize Your Success
From master pianists to NASCAR drivers, all people who are good at something have one thing in common, they practice. If you want to be good at talking in front of people you have to practice. If you want to be good at conversing in social situations you have to practice. Of course if you go about whatever you want to do without rehearsing it can be quite nerve wracking. In fact if you try something that you are not good at yet and fail completely it is possible your progress might be set back indefinitely.
So how can you prepare for a successful outcome? You can visualize your success in the theater of your mind. Letâ€™s say you want to be able to speak up at business meetings. Find a place where you can sit or lie down comfortably without being disturbed. Now relax. Use some progressive muscle relation or just tell yourself I am relaxed and calm, relaxed and calm, over and over again until you are relaxed and calm.
Now play a movie in your mind of how you would like for the events to transpire. Make the movie as vivid and clear as possible. Use your imagination to see the details, hear the voices and other sounds in the room. Feel how you would sit. Then in your mind address the group as if you already had the confidence you are striving to develop. Notice how you appear, how your heart beats, how you breathe. Make the adjustments necessary to achieve the outcome you desire. If you are having problems seeing yourself accomplishing the task(s) well, focus on the why, the potential benefits youâ€™ll get from achieving your goal. Practice over and over again until you have that image etched firmly in your mind.
Once youâ€™ve practiced with visualization itâ€™s time for step six.
6. Go Do It
Youâ€™ve decided to change. You know the reason(s) you want to change. You know your motivation. You have a model and youâ€™ve prepared in the theater of your mind. Now its time to give it a try. If what you want to do is speak in your business meetings at work, give it a try. Even if itâ€™s only a few words or to comment on someone elseâ€™s comments, as long as you are doing something that is moving you toward your goal, just do it. If you are looking to meet more people you might start by smiling at people you meet and saying â€œhiâ€. You will become more confident through the process of stretching yourself. This will move you toward your goals.
Now that youâ€™ve actually done what you set out to accomplish its time for the final seventh step.
7. Decide that Everything is Feedback
When we start new things, from playing a new sport to meeting new people, we are not going to be excellent at it from the very start. Everything takes practice. When you do something you are not good at (yet) you are stretching yourself, you feel uncomfortable and you will make some mistakes.
Developing confidence in whatever it is you want to develop it in will also take practice. And just like learning anything, you will sometimes do things that you may not have preferred to do if you were â€œperfectâ€ at it. You will make some mistakes.
When that happens remind yourself that mistakes are the way we all learn. A mistake is not failure, it is merely feedback. By calling it feedback you have re-framed or redefined your results.
So from now on instead of thinking of having â€œfailedâ€ when things donâ€™t work out â€œrightâ€ merely observe what happens and call them â€œresultsâ€. Understand the feedback you have been given by your results and apply it to approaching your task differently the next time. The key is to remember that no matter what results you achieve, when you define them as feedback, they become either actions you want to do again or actions you donâ€™t want to do again. You now are experiencing feedback instead of failure.
Once you start seeing your results as feedback youâ€™ll begin adjusting your actions to match what you want to achieve. This will help you persist until you achieve your desired outcome. If you are committed to this process you will be able to build life long confidence in any area of your life.
So letâ€™s review the seven steps.
1. Decide to change. 2. Decide why itâ€™s Important 3. Understand Your Motivation 4. Find Someone to Model 5. Visualize Success 6. Go Do It 7. Decide that Everything is Feedback
Thatâ€™s it, seven simple steps that can move you toward confidence in any area of you life. Seven easy steps toward achieving more out of life. So what are you waiting for? Why not start on your life long confidence journey today?

Utilizing Strategic Motivation in the Workplace By Benedict Smythe

2008-07-14T01:40:00.000-07:00

Utilizing Strategic Motivation in the Workplace by Benedict Smythe
A good understanding of motivated behavior is an invaluable tool towards improving productivity in the workplace.
How does this work? Put simply, motivated employees are workers that are more productive. If people are properly motivated, they are likely to be more good-natured about their work and will less likely need constant supervision. The reason for this is because they want to achieve defined goals. These goals serve as their motivating factors.
How to apply motivational strategy
First, understand the basic concept of motivation. This usually operates on the principle of rewarded behavior. Many of these "rewards" are sometimes seemingly so miniscule that they are often overlooked. Things like commensurate pay or "equal pay for equal work," a healthy working environment, and good working relationships can, by themselves, already be good motivation.
If you think about it for a moment, this is a basic means towards ensuring loyalty. Not all workplaces have healthy working environments, and most people usually leave a working environment due to a host of small, unsatisfactory details that together make up what to them is an unbearable working condition.
If you think that these details and factors are so small that they do not warrant too much attention, think again. Seen in the proper light, they involve basic needs - the need for harmonious relationships, for satisfactory pay commensurate with the work that people put their efforts into, and being able to work in an environment that is clean, safe and non-threatening.
Motivation for Driven Growth
When you have those basic factors taken care of, you can now look towards using proper motivation to promote growth and development.
Make it sufficiently clear that a particular type of behavior will be rewarded. Hence, loyalty to a company, extra effort and creative contributions will be rewarded by promotions, recognition, benefits, and salary increases. Furthermore, these kinds of rewards will be doled out in a fair, merit-based and democratic manner.
Affirmative Motivation
You can, of course, motivate by means of threats, pressures or intimidation. And maybe threats might even work, too. But this is a very poor means towards encouraging teamwork and building cooperation, not to mention keeping people working for you. Should people decide that they simply cannot work with you, they will eventually leave.
Affirmative motivation, on the other hand, has exactly the opposite effect. Not only that, but such incentives and opportunities can actually encourage people to contribute to the company's growth - even outside of their normal duties and responsibilities.
If people like their work, are loyal to and appreciate the company or organization that they are working for, they are more likely to want to contribute to its growth. The value of having such motivated employees is priceless.
The Human Aspect
Hence, recognizing the various levels of motivation in a person makes for a healthier working environment all around. This means that you realize that workers and employees are also human, driven by needs, wants, and opportunities.
Recognizing the human aspect in the workplace can open the doorway for the formulation of better office policies. Instead of coercing people to do their work, it would be better to seek to promote motivated behavior. You might find that growth follows quite naturally in its wake.

How Can I Controll Stress? By Gary Kenneth Archer

2008-07-14T01:38:00.000-07:00

Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired? Stress is a major contributor to many maladies that inflict us humans. Day after day we drudge on worrying about every imaginable thing some so trivial that it's just plain stupid.
Humans are the only earthly animal that has such a problem.(as far as we know!) Other animals go about go about their business undaunted of stressful situations. We are seemingly addicted to stress. Stress has literally taken over our lives. It is as if we fuel our bodies on a daily basis with stress. Seems ridiculous doesn't it, but you know exactly what I'm talking about, we thrive on everyday stress. Well if we thrive on it why eliminate it; what's the point? The point is stress is a killer, it's out to get you, throw you to the ground and stomp all over you.
Stress is a killer
Talk to any doctor and they will tell you unequivocally that stress damages the body immeasurably in countless ways. Stress is the silent killer that infiltrates and then does it's damage overtime. Okay you know you are stressful and you don't like it one bit but how in the world can we eliminate something that is so much of our life? You don't eliminate stress you control stress. A certain amount of stress is actually good for you, it produces a sense of urgency, a motivation, a driving force. Stress can be compared to an adrenaline rush in as much they both create a burst of energy a sense of urgency. The trick is to harness stress so it works for you not against you.
What is Stress?
Stress is negative energy (worry), bottled up inside with no where to go. Most stress is self-induced. We are a fast paced society, continually trying to go faster. For example, if a speed limit is set at 55-mph invariably most drivers will push the limit and go at least 10-mph faster. It is our nature to push the limit. We are driven to exceed, succeed, and proceed. Unfortunately stress is a part of our everyday lives so we need to deal with it.
Controlling Stress
People make things more difficult then need be. Life needn't be complicated. Simple is better. Uncomplicate your life. Set a rule of priorities for your day to day life. Make these priorities realistic, simple, uncomplicated. Know your limitations don't over extend abilities.
Here are some things that can help you reduce stress.
1.Start your day earlier then you normally would. Allow yourself plenty of time to get ready for work.2.Eat a sensible breakfast allowing enough time to actually relax and enjoy breakfast.3.Don't watch the doom and gloom news while eating breakfast start the day on a positive note.4.Allow a lot of time to comfortably get to work and if your driving listen to some good music and drive within the speed limit.
5.Limit your caffeine intake to one cup of coffee in the morning and three cups total for the day.6.Avoid refined sugar foods such as doughnuts, processed cereals, pop tarts etc.7.Don't drink any soft drinks for are loaded with sugar.8.Stop with all the competition with co-workers do your job to the best of your ability and good things will happen.9.Be happy for others who succeed in their endeavors.10.Drink plenty of clean unpolluted spring water. Water naturally detoxifies the body.
11.If possible take a short nap. I personally nap half an hour after my half-hour lunch.12.Set realistic goals. Too many people try to accomplish too much too quickly. Most good things worth striving for require a lot of nurturing.13.Stop worrying about things that are out of your control. 90% of everyday concerns are about stuff you can't do a wit to change.14.If a particularly stressful moment or situation occurs take a deep breath (or many) reflect on a pleasant memory and then proceed slowly, deliberately, maintaining control.15.Set time aside everyday for 'family talk' where family members can express their thoughts, problems and communicate one to another. This is a solid 'stress buster'.16.Eat nutrious foods high in vitamins and minerals low in calories. Good food delivers optimum health thus reducing stress.17.Live within your means don't buy things you know you can't afford.18.Only use credit cards for emergencies and plan on paying dept in full each month.19.Don't try to keep up with what others have, (I.e. neighbors, family, and friends.) be happy for them, don't resent what they have. 20.Ground your life in faith, family, and friends. Express your love for the important people in your life openly, let them know how you feel about them without any expectations.21.Laugh often, smile alot.
22.Exercise moderately at least 3 times a week.23.Sleep a sound 8 hours every night this alone will reduce stress dramatically.24.Finally accept the fact that life is unpredictable and we all will be thrown a curve ball now and then that may flatten us for a time. Find solace in your faith and know that things will get better and always think highly of yourself.Stress can be controlled however you must take it seriously and make a plan of action. The silent killer is lurking just below the surface and it wants to destroy you. Are you up for the challenge?

Motivation By Claudia Miclaus

2008-07-14T01:14:00.000-07:00

Enlarge ImageHave you ever wondered about the wheel that drives our life, our actions? What is it "made of"? Due to our personal reasons, we chose to do or not do certain things. Human actions are determined by internal and external causes and motivation is the one that represents the internal cause that leads to our behavior. Thus, motivation represents the psychical structure that orientates, sets off and energetically sustains our behavior. Motivation is a structural ensemble of our motives. However, not every cause is a motive! It is very hard to distinguish between motives, yet here is a list of the basic things that determine most of our actions and we face those most often: hunger and thirst, fear and entering the defensive mode, frustration, stress, conflicts, attachment, erotic motivation, self-accomplishment motivation and so on. Let’s see a brief explanation on each of these motives as shown below: Fear When it comes to fear, we have two kinds of fear: temporary and permanent. Temporary fear appears in certain situations and is normal and present in every person’s life. Permanent fear turns into a state of perpetual insecurity (anxiety), which can develop into a pathological state, neurotic fear. It can turn into inhibition (decrease in intellectual capability, even if attention and vigilance grow). Stress Stress can be caused by deadlines or tasks that we very well know we can not accomplish in due time. If not avoided as much as possible, putting ourselves in stressful situations can have devastating effects. Frustration Frustration is linked to the psychical state of one that has been deprived of a legit satisfaction or has been misled and been disappointed. The consequences are the rising on inner tension and a series of specific reactions. Generally, it is produced by the existence of certain obstacles, barriers. Individuals may have very different reactions depending on the existent barriers: eliminating the barrier, avoiding the barrier or searching for some compensation. Conflicts Conflicts appear when two tendencies of the same intensity are born simultaneously but become incompatible motivations that cannot be accomplished at the same time. Attachment Attachment is the ensemble of bonds between individuals. Erotic motivation Erotic motivation has biological as well as social bases. Man’s erotic conduit is very much influenced by society, by the conception existent about the role and interests of men and women. Erotic motivation is tightly glued to the feeling of love, a very complex feeling in our modern society. Self accomplishment Self accomplishment motivation manifests itself when an individual knows that his actions will be appreciated through a performance standard. It is an energizing factor, stimulated by the presence of other persons. This means permanently comparing yourself to others and sometimes desiring to dominate. This depends on the level of motivation, as well as the probability of success. Success Success depends a great deal on the motivation of an individual! Rewards motivate, praises motivate! We need to be appreciated in order to do a certain activity. Satisfaction appears only when we are content with the activity that we are conducting. A non-motivated individual is a walking disaster. Most of us sleep our life away and it’s not always our fault. If there is nothing surrounding us that can motivate us then we have no interest whatsoever in taking up a certain activity. Let’s face it: we work so we can be appreciated for who we are and also for sustaining our physical existence. If the rewards fail to come, we are not motivated and consequently, we give up. Our mistake is that we often quit too soon out of fear of embarrassment, or laziness or well, there can be a million of other reasons! It’s a tragedy to be one of the persons that are not motivated by anything. A fact that we know for certain-as all the cemeteries show- is that we’ve only got one chance to live here on Earth. Of course being born just to die, offers no motivation whatsoever if you look at it in perspective. I believe in life after death and that motivates me but this is another subject to seriously consider. So, coming back on Earth, why not make the most of our human existence? Let’s be the ones that reward ourselves and in the process, guide and motivate other people so they can find their motivation and live a fruitful life. They say ‘Winners never quit and quitters never win’ and throughout time, this saying has proved itself to be relevant in all situations. We were not meant to be quitters, but winners! We most certainly should start acting like it!

How To Motivate Yourself By Jhon Wesley

2008-07-14T00:48:00.000-07:00

How To Motivate Yourself - Self MotivationJuly 19th, 2007 by John Wesley
Staying motivated is a struggle — our drive is constantly assaulted by negative thoughts and anxiety about the future. Everyone faces doubt and depression. What separates the highly successful is the ability to keep moving forward.
There is no simple solution for a lack of motivation. Even after beating it, the problem reappears at the first sign of failure. The key is understanding your thoughts and how they drive your emotions. By learning how to nurture motivating thoughts, neutralize negative ones, and focus on the task at hand, you can pull yourself out of a slump before it gains momentum.
Reasons We Lose Motivation
There are 3 primary reasons we lose motivation.
Lack of confidence - If you don’t believe you can succeed, what’s the point in trying?
Lack of focus - If you don’t know what you want, do you really want anything?
Lack of direction - If you don’t know what to do, how can you be motivated to do it?
How to Boost Confidence
The first motivation killer is a lack of confidence. When this happens to me, it’s usually because I’m focusing entirely on what I want and neglecting what I already have. When you only think about what you want, your mind creates explanations for why you aren’t getting it. This creates negative thoughts. Past failures, bad breaks, and personal weaknesses dominate your mind. You become jealous of your competitors and start making excuses for why you can’t succeed. In this state, you tend to make a bad impression, assume the worst about others, and lose self confidence.
The way to get out of this thought pattern is to focus on gratitude. Set aside time to focus on everything positive in your life. Make a mental list of your strengths, past successes, and current advantages. We tend to take our strengths for granted and dwell on our failures. By making an effort to feel grateful, you’ll realize how competent and successful you already are. This will rejuvenate your confidence and get you motivated to build on your current success.
It might sound strange that repeating things you already know can improve your mindset, but it’s amazingly effective. The mind distorts reality to confirm what it wants to believe. The more negatively you think, the more examples your mind will discover to confirm that belief. When you truly believe that you deserve success, your mind will generate ways to achieve it. The best way to bring success to yourself is to genuinely desire to create value for the rest of the world.
Developing Tangible Focus
The second motivation killer is a lack of focus. How often do you focus on what you don’t want, rather than on a concrete goal? We normally think in terms of fear. I’m afraid of being poor. I’m afraid no one will respect me. I’m afraid of being alone. The problem with this type of thinking is that fear alone isn’t actionable. Instead of doing something about our fear, it feeds on itself and drains our motivation.
If you’re caught up in fear based thinking, the first step is focusing that energy on a well defined goal. By defining a goal, you automatically define a set of actions. If you have a fear of poverty, create a plan to increase your income. It could be going back to school, obtaining a higher paying job, or developing a profitable website. The key is moving from an intangible desire to concrete, measurable steps.
By focusing your mind on a positive goal instead of an ambiguous fear, you put your brain to work. It instantly begins devising a plan for success. Instead of worrying about the future you start to do something about it. This is the first step in motivating yourself to take action. When know what you want, you become motivated to take action.
Developing Direction
The final piece in the motivational puzzle is direction. If focus means having an ultimate goal, direction is having a day-to-day strategy to achieve it. A lack of direction kills motivation because without an obvious next action we succumb to procrastination. An example of this is a person who wants to have a popular blog, but who spends more time reading posts about blogging than actually writing articles.
The key to finding direction is identifying the activities that lead to success. For every goal, there are activities that pay off and those that don’t. Make a list of all your activities and arrange them based on results. Then make a make an action plan that focuses on the activities that lead to big returns. To continue the example from above, a blogger’s list would look something like this:
Write content
Research relevant topics
Network with other bloggers
Optimize design and ad placements
Answer comments and email
Read other blogs
Keeping track of your most important tasks will direct your energy towards success. Without a constant reminder, it’s easy to waste entire days on filler activities like reading RSS feeds, email, and random web surfing.
When my motivation starts to wane, I regain direction by creating a plan that contains two positive actions. The first one should be a small task you’ve been meaning to do, while the second should be a long-term goal. I immediately do the smaller task. This creates positive momentum. After that I take the first step towards achieving the long-term goal. Doing this periodically is great for getting out of a slump, creating positive reinforcement, and getting long-term plans moving.
It’s inevitable that you’ll encounter periods of low energy, bad luck, and even the occasional failure. If you don’t discipline your mind, these minor speed bumps can turn into mental monsters. By being on guard against the top 3 motivation killers you can preserve your motivation and propel yourself to success.

Self Motivation Techniques By Yogi Barra

2008-07-14T00:13:00.001-07:00

Motivation. It’s probably one of the hardest things to keep and maintain when studying for a computer certification - particularly when trying to juggle the demands of everyday life. Some of these certifications can be long and arduous, and trying to find the time and the inclination to keep hitting the books can tax even the most determined person. But motivation can also be one of the most powerful tools that you have at your disposal. If you are determined to succeed, chances are you will.Here you'll find some tips and suggestions for finding, and keeping, your motivation. If you have any motivational tips of your own that you'd care to share we'd love to hear from you.

Goal setting – set your goal and then keep your mind focused on it. Make your goals demanding enough to warrant effort on your part, but not too difficult that you’re likely to fail. Success breeds success, so start your goal setting off with easier tasks, and slowly increase the pressure as you get further along the certification track.
Set the date of the exam before you've done any study. This means youI have a fixed time to get ready for it. Don't put too much pressure on yourself by setting an unrealistic deadline, but by having a deadline looming you'll be less likely to let things slide.
Surround yourself with things that motivate you. Posters, plants, photo's of loved ones, pictures of things that you'd like to attain (like cars etc). If you've achieved other computer certifications hang those on the wall too.
Don’t let setbacks get you down mentally, and don't let the thought of failing an exam get you stressed. You can always retake it. Life is full of successes and failures. Concentrate on the successes, and don’t dwell on the failures. They will happen.
If you're stuck on a certain topic or concept and you're finding it difficult to retain the information, take a break or move on to another topic. If it's not sticking in the brain, don't try to force it.
Let yourself get excited by success, no matter how small. Don’t let other people’s lack of enthusiasm for your successes drag you down. Get intoxicated with your own achievements, and surround yourself with people who have a positive attitude to success, particularly yours.
Reward yourself with each success. Some certification tracks consist of a number of unit exams. After successfully passing each stage, reward yourself for your success. It doesn't have to cost money either. A simple reward is having a couple of weeks off from studying.
Believe in yourself. Believe you can and will succeed, and don’t compare yourself to other people. Use people as yardsticks if you wish, but don’t compare your performance and ability to any other person.
Look past obstacles. Adopt a ‘how I can’ attitude, and not a ‘why I can’t’ one. The more you adopt this philosophy the more a part of your life it will become.
Talk to other people about your goals. Tell them about it at every opportunity. Bore them stupid. Not only will this help you to keep your goals at the forefront of your mind, it will also motivate you to actually achieve them as you’ve now told everyone about them. As an added bonus, chances are you’ll have bored them so much that they will leave you alone to study in peace.
Focus on just one or two things at a time. Don’t spread yourself too thinly. For example, if you’re doing the CCNA certification, just concentrate on one exam at a time, and give no thought to the entire track. Take each exam one at a time and try to set them up so that the first exam compliments the next one in terms of content. Remember, if you chase two rabbits, both will escape.
Learn from others who have been there, done that. Read discussion groups and feed off the success from others who have gone before you. Don’t dwell on those posters in the groups who have failed and just complain all the time. Focus on those who passed and succeeded.
Visualise yourself having achieved your goal. Let yourself daydream and imagine having that job you’re working toward, and consistently remind yourself what your life could be like when you reach your goals. Just don’t do it too often - you should be studying